Shams' Identity Response- DRAFT

By now I should know what shade of red my blood is
To represent who I am in a world full of uncertainty
And to keep my grandmother's blood running through generations
I used to be ashamed to never have been able to keep up with the culture

My mother tells me
'You used to sit on your baby chair and grandma would make you Dolma, how can you not remember?'
My father asks me
'What do you know about your country? About your culture?'
My sister mocks me
'You wouldn't remember because you were too young'
My brother insults me
'You don't know how to speak Arabic; I'll speak in English so you can understand'

For the most part,
They are right.
I don't remember very much of my grandparents
I don't know much about my country's history
I was too young to remember everything
I don't understand Arabic to the extent that my family does

But I have been privileged to meet my existing family on the other side of the world
To have parents that educate me about my culture on a daily basis
To have photographs and videos of my past
And to have the ability to understand, let alone, speak the language of my ancestors